[ vie doesn't know how to staunch this wound, how to convince jaejin that nothing is going to happen as long as he believes it to be so. sunni isn't a particularly big worry on his part; he does this, he'd told him. he tries to scratch down below the surface and tear things apart because he'd never really been happy about their arrangement or their marriage. his father had seen to it after learning of vie's ability, thought it useful in the scheme of things, and there had been a far darker one-sided attraction vie had used to secure his place. now, he thinks, none of that matters. none of it has since his feelings for jaejin had erupted into something real.
he feels it when jaejin whispers that word, when he begs him for something he doesn't need to specify. he knows. he's always known, and he clings to it almost as desperately as he pushes against him, dragging jaejin back to squeeze him close in an embrace so tight it would eventually grow uncomfortable. his lips brush jaejin's neck, the curve of his shoulder. ]
You are mine, always. Nothing will ever change that. [ his voice grows softer. ] Please don't worry.
[ it doesn't put an end to it, not really, but jaejin doubts there's really anything that would. he thinks, in a way, he's been wary of losing vie since they crossed paths and it has only intensified over the time they've spent together. this past week has been particularly rough in that regard, seeing vie crumple to the ground, waiting in the hospital with no news. trying to field sunni and failing, just as usual. he wants to believe everything will be fine. he wants to believe vie more than anything.
it's what makes him hold tighter to his hand, tuck back into his embrace. it might be too much later, but it's what he needs now and vie always seems to know. at the brush of his lips, jaejin presses his face against the pillow, letting it somewhat muffle the harsh breath his words draw from him. ]
I can't promise I won't. [ the truth, if nothing else. ] But I believe in you. No matter what happens, my entire heart is yours. It doesn't belong to me anymore.
[ it's the truth, at least, and vie takes it in stride, holding him tightly and doing his best to hush his worries with all that he is. the proximity should help—and the fact he's no longer drunk on the floor. they are small steps, things that vie can help jaejin control, and if this is all he can do for now, then he will do it as well as he can.
still, the pull of jaejin's words cause him to squeeze tighter, pushing his face into the back of his shoulder as he holds him. for someone like him, something like that is almost too much responsibility. he's barely managed to take care of his own; how would he do with someone else's? how could jaejin give it to him so freely knowing what their futures might be? how could vie take it and not want to protect it? what would he ever do if he lost it?
it's not something he wants to think about, nuzzling him gently after a moment of racing thoughts. ]
I promise to do my best to care for it. [ and he hopes, more than anything, that he doesn't mess it up. ] I love you, Jaejin. I don't need or want anyone else.
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he feels it when jaejin whispers that word, when he begs him for something he doesn't need to specify. he knows. he's always known, and he clings to it almost as desperately as he pushes against him, dragging jaejin back to squeeze him close in an embrace so tight it would eventually grow uncomfortable. his lips brush jaejin's neck, the curve of his shoulder. ]
You are mine, always. Nothing will ever change that. [ his voice grows softer. ] Please don't worry.
no subject
it's what makes him hold tighter to his hand, tuck back into his embrace. it might be too much later, but it's what he needs now and vie always seems to know. at the brush of his lips, jaejin presses his face against the pillow, letting it somewhat muffle the harsh breath his words draw from him. ]
I can't promise I won't. [ the truth, if nothing else. ] But I believe in you. No matter what happens, my entire heart is yours. It doesn't belong to me anymore.
no subject
still, the pull of jaejin's words cause him to squeeze tighter, pushing his face into the back of his shoulder as he holds him. for someone like him, something like that is almost too much responsibility. he's barely managed to take care of his own; how would he do with someone else's? how could jaejin give it to him so freely knowing what their futures might be? how could vie take it and not want to protect it? what would he ever do if he lost it?
it's not something he wants to think about, nuzzling him gently after a moment of racing thoughts. ]
I promise to do my best to care for it. [ and he hopes, more than anything, that he doesn't mess it up. ] I love you, Jaejin. I don't need or want anyone else.